Universal Loving Kindness and Emotional Self

Hello Everyone!

Well, the first exercise I practiced was the Universal Loving Kindness meditation exercise.  This one was a little difficult because we had to memorize those four lines then meditate on them; however, I was able to do it!  After I went over them for a little bit, I lied down, closed my eyes, and began.  At first, I was wishing this for all people, but then my mind started going to this one lady, Rachel, and I put her name in place of "all individuals."  I have no idea who Rachel is, but in my Bible Study group someone wrote down a prayer request for her.  She just had twins and while she was pregnant she found out she has colon cancer and only has about 12 months to live; meditating on it and thinking about it right now is bringing tears to my eyes.  I really want her self-suffering to go away and her find health, happiness, and wholeness; I want her cancer to go away so she can see her daughters grow up.  Her husband had been previously married, and he lost his first wife to a car accident and had two sons with her; now he is facing the loss of his second wife and has two twin daughters with her.  I ask y'all please pray for this family.

I feel, right now, the aspect in my life I need and want to work on is the emotional part of the psychospiritual side.  I know I am a female and we are known to have mood swings, but I tend to get them a lot; especially towards my husband when he doesn't deserve it.  I will sometimes get angry with him and try to make him feel guilty; I know when I do this and I don't like it, yet it is hard for me to stop.  I meditated on this for a while (while listening to some mediation music to help clear my mind) and I came to the realization that I need to control my emotions and not let them control me.  My husband loves me and he doesn't intentionally upset me as I do to him at times. 

Well....some activities I can do to help foster growth in both these areas is to continue to meditate on them.  I still need to learn how to better clear my mind and only focus on what I am meditating on, but with time, I should be able to do it!!!

Y'all have a relaxing day :-)

-Natasja        

Subtle Mind Practice

Hello everyone!

The Subtle Mind exercise was intense.  Like the loving-kindness exercise, I had a hard time with this one also; the Loving-Kindness practice was difficult because I was not able to picture and feel what the narrator was telling me to and Subtle Mind I was not able to get to a point of having no thoughts.  I feel like I am doing something wrong with both of these practices.  I know I will not pick it up the first time I try it; but I want to!  During the beginning of the Subtle Mind practice, there were a couple of times where I didn't have any thoughts come up, but then I would think about the fact that I'm not having any thoughts, and then thoughts would arise.  It was a vicious little cycle.  Unfortunately, I was never able to come to calm-abiding.  I am positive that with practice, I will be able to get both the Loving-Kindness and Subtle Mind practices down; it may take a while, but I am willing to practice it as much as possible.  I will probably start off slow, like 5 minutes a day, and then gradually build the time up for each.  I WILL GET THIS!

I think developing a spiritual awareness will allow one's mental and physical health to increase; it will allow a person to have holistic and integral health because all sides, mental, physical and spiritual, are being covered.  I am very religious, so why does it seem that I am having a hard time finding my spiritual self?  I am slowly learning that these two things are very different.  I am also starting to realize that this connection, spiritual wellness connecting to mental and physical wellness, is important in order to have a holistic filled life!  However, I am not yet sure how it is manifested in my life just yet; through practice, I am hoping to find out. :-D

-Natasja 

Loving-Kindness and Mental Workouts

Hello everyone!

I don't know about y'all, but I did not receive a CD for the Dacher text; however there was a little mp3 in doc sharing that was about loving-kindness and so I listened to that.  It was actually the same thing I (and y'all) read this week in the Dacher text, but this time I was able to lie down, close my eyes, and imagine everything the narrator was saying.  It started off pretty nicely, imagining someone close to me whom I love dearly; I happened to think about my daughter.  I know, I know, I should have thought about my husband, but for some reason, my daughter just kept popping up in my head, and I couldn't stop thinking about her (she's impossible not to love!).  During that part I was able to concentrate and I did feel this warm feeling in my heart and then I was able to concentrate on a loved one who is suffering; however, as the session progressed, I kept finding it harder and harder to concentrate and my mind just kept wandering aimlessly. 

I loved the warm feeling I received in my heart as I was thinking about my daughter and the one that is suffering; I even got a little teary eyed!  It felt really good.  So, then, why was it so hard to picture loving my enemies or those I don't really talk to due to our past history???  Who knows...I think I just need more practice! 

So, would I recommend this to others?  Sure!  Why?  Because everyone should learn how to open their heart and love a little more.  We all need to practice loving, caring, and showing genuine kindness to all those around us :-)

This brings me to the topic of "Mental Workouts."  Just like our body needs a workout; our minds do as well!  Having a daily mental workout can lead to a more developed mind and in turn, can create what we have all been reading about, "human flourishing--health, happiness, and wholeness" (Dacher, 2006, p. 62).  Research has actually shown that mental workouts can reduce negative thoughts such as "anger, hatred, fear, worry, confusion, and doubt;" tell me, who wants those thoughts?  Not me!  So I think I should do some mental workout so I can get the positive thoughts that have been shown through research such as "patience, openness, acceptance, and happiness" and as I talked about 2 seconds ago, "loving-kindness!" 

One mental workout I could throw in my daily life would be to meditate while counting back from 100; once I get good at that, maybe skipping every few numbers and just doing the even or odd numbers.  I wonder if meditating and just thinking positive thoughts would help?  Either way, just like I take my physical body to the gym, I need to take my brain to the mental "gym!"

Y'all have a wonderful and relaxing day!

-Natasja

Reference:

Dacher, E. S. (2006). Integral health: the path to human flourishing. Basic Health Publications: California

Reflections of my Wellbeing--and Some More Relaxing!

Hello everyone!

For some reason, trying to reflect on myself and where I would rate myself in the categories of physical wellbeing, spiritual wellbeing, and psychological wellbeing seems so difficult for me; I honestly have never had deep thoughts about these aspects in my life before.  With that said, I know it is important for me to focus on this and figure out where I am in each aspect; knowing where I stand can help me work on myself and eventually become happier, healthier, and enjoy life more than I already do!

I would rate my physical wellbeing around a 7.  I give it this score because I try to be as physically active as possible so I will stay fit and happy with my body; there are areas that I feel need a lot more work (who doesn't feel that way?), but eventually I will get to where I want to be.  A goal I could work towards in this aspect is training for some type of competition, such as a half marathon, or weight lifting; the half marathon seems more my style though...haha!  To get moving towards this goal, I can find a training program and follow it so I will be prepared for the race when the time comes. 

I rate my spiritual wellbeing around a 5 or 6.  I am slowly learning more about God and what He has done for not only me, but for everyone else!  I attend a Women's Bible study once a week and go to Church every Sunday to help my spiritual self grow to its fullest potential.  A goal here would be to continue going to Bible Study every week; even when we move to Turkey.  I can actively search for a Bible group to attend there even before we move.

I rate my psychological wellbeing at a 4.  I do not work on this aspect of my life very often; I sometimes journal, but probably not as often as I should.  A goal here would be to journal everyday so that I can look back at where I have been and how much I have accomplished in my life when I grow old and gray; getting a journal and figuring out a good time and place to write would be one of the first activities I can do to help reach this goal. 

The relaxation exercise this week was definitely relaxing; however, I felt a bit frustrated as well.  It was extremely hard for me to focus on it and all the colors and what the represented.  My mind kept going to and from my daughter and husband (they had a daddy-daughter date so I could spend some much needed time by myself...YAY!!!).  During the exercise, I was mainly able to focus on my deep breathing and the different phrases the narrator wanted me to focus on such as "I am grounded," "I am loved," and "my life has a meaningful purpose." Although I couldn't concentrate on the entire exercise, what I was able to focus on helped me relax and it felt wonderful!! 

Y'all have a relaxing and peaceful day!

-Natasja